Ah, the fog of Sudafed

So last Friday I got sick, as in throat scratchy, head pounding, snot simultaneously running out my nose and clogging it sick. Thankfully it's not the flu, or H1N1 for that matter. But I felt shitty enough to take the day off from work and not get out of bed until 7 at night. Which leads me to the wonders of modern pharmacology. Man I love using science to make me feel better a couple of pills and a few hours at a time. In those moments of only being about 75% in reality, I find my mind wandering, not staying put unless I put a little extra effort into it, and half the time it doesn't listen to me anyways. So here's a list of stuff I discovered while hopped up on Sudafed:

1) American Apparel only makes men's pants to size 34 - fat hipsters need not apply.
2) Blade Runner can induce Zen-like calmness when coupled with cold medication.
3) Driving a car becomes a fun, unpredictable experiance again.
4) Math is not your friend.
5) One's ability to empathize with that homeless person asking for change is directly proportional to how much snot it feels like is inside your skull.
6) On the subject of homelessness, I'm pretty sure that crazy woman with the beard yelling at invisible monsters has the power to drag you to Hell, so be nice to her.

I'm going to bed now.

Strange Dreams

I have strange dreams. I know everyone views their dreams as strange, but we are only privvy to our own, and to me my subconscious comes up with some bizarre shit.

Last night I remember being at a house party where one of my exes arrived, and unlike the last time I saw her in real life, we were actually cordial and, dare I say it, affectionate. This was a woman I haven't thought of in years, and I mean YEARS. Why my brain decided to dredge her up I'll never figure out. The only part that was like reality was where she making out with another guy mere moments after professing her love for me.

My second dream was much more interesting - it was an episode of Mad Men that seemed like what the last episode would be. Both Don Draper and Pete Campbell left Sterling Cooper to work in much lower paying jobs, and they were cool with it. Then Don and Pete actually became friends. Best part? Don actually leaves Betty. That chick is crazy, yo.

Next time I wake up after sleeping for only five hours (which I do every night now) I'm just gonna get up. I can't take much more of this madness.