Time to Regenerate

As awesome as it would be to be David Tennant (or the Doctor, for that matter. Especially 10 or 2 or 8. But not 6. LAME-O), I'm not. I'm me, a simple human who can only experience time in the one direction that every one else does. Yet change is constant, and while sometimes you want things to stay exactly as they are, sometimes you jettison the past with such a ferocity it starts to scare you.

Let's back up half a tick. This new year/decade has mysteriously been serving as an excuse to shake things up, to try something new. I'm moving (not surprising really, considering the current pad should be condemned, or at the very least gutted and remodeled), I'm seriously on a diet, and I shaved off my beard.

I'll give you folks at home a moment to let that last part sink in.

It's gone, vanished, disappeared into the ether. I hacked off something I've carried around with me for over a year straight, and with a few short breaks, damn near three. Admittedly I look a little goofy. There's no hiding that awkward double-chin that says hello when I tilt my head down. My hair is cut pretty short too, so I seem to be some strange descendant of Curly Howard who hasn't quite got his ancestor's baby smooth skull. I may grow the beard back out, then again I may not. But for now it's off; let's see how it goes.

Aside from jettisoning my facial hair, I'm also jettisoning a bunch of my Stuff (yes, that's capital 'S' Stuff). Stuff that has accumulated since freshman year of college, Stuff I haven't looked at in years and quite frankly am having a hard time remembering why the hell I was holding onto it in the first place. Papers. old t-shirts, VHS tapes that I have on DVD, Stuff like that. Mainly I didn't want to move it yet again, but as I was going through it, my resistance to throwing/giving away my Stuff was shockingly low. I plan on making my third trip to goodwill tomorrow to give away my Stuff, and I'll probably be going back there again.

Starting this week, I'll also be selling a few select items. An unused but still useful computer & monitor. My fantastic 27" flatscreen CRT television that is a modern antique, the end of 60+ years of cathode ray tech that is currently the last thing I can play Duck Hunt on. My dining table set, coffee table and couch I'm giving to my current roommates, if they want them. If not, they're all going on the auction block too.

At this point I should address what some of you are thinking, and no, I'm not planning on committing suicide or leaving the state, never to be heard from again. I just feel the need to CHANGE some of the things in my life, and now is a great time. Now is perfect. It's time to regenerate, which brings me back to the theme of this missive. Please bear with me as I nerd out for a sec...

For those who don't know (or care), the BBC show "Doctor Who" is the world's longest running science-fiction program. It debuted in 1963 on the day JFK was shot (great timing, that), and originally ran until 1989, then had this random TV movie in 1996, then came back in 2005 and still going strong. It follows the adventure of an alien known as the Doctor, who travels through time and space and, when injured and facing death, can "regenerate" his form, thus restoring his health and allowing for another actor to take over the titular role. Although the actors look and act differently than each other, they are all playing the same person, with the same memories and attitudes and abilities as the man before him. Most recently, the very popular Tenth Doctor, played by David Tennant, regenerated into the Eleventh Doctor, who is played by Matt Smith (my personal jury's still out on the new kid, we'll see if that Flock of Seagulls hair ruins the show or not).

"Why are you telling me this? I don't give a shit about British TV or Time Lords or Flock of Seagulls haircuts!" Fine, I'll wrap this up. The point of all this is to say that everyone has this ability to regenerate themselves. I'm not talking about completely changing who someone is, where they reinvent themselves into something unrecognizable as they were before. I'm talking about renewal, keeping my core being the same ranting, nerdy, charming, slightly loony self the same, while regenerating into a newer, hopefully better man.

Like this guy.

That's the hope, anyways. I feel like the last eight or nine months have been speeding towards this newest regeneration. My last self had a hell of a run, but it's time for change. And change feels good. ALLONS-Y!